11 January, 2026
struggling-mother-seeks-help-to-escape-abusive-marriage

A woman facing a challenging and abusive marriage has reached out for help, expressing her desperate need to escape her situation. She describes her husband as a verbally and economically abusive alcoholic whose drinking has intensified over the past year, affecting the entire family.

The mother of three children, who has not worked in eight years, fears the impact of their constant fighting on her kids. Despite her efforts to find employment, she has struggled to secure a job, further complicating her desire to leave the toxic relationship. In her plea for advice, she reveals a profound sense of hopelessness, stating, “I have nowhere to go, no money, no car, no job.” She feels trapped and is seeking guidance on how to proceed.

Seeking Support in Times of Crisis

In her response, advice columnist Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, emphasized the importance of contacting the National Domestic Violence Hotline. This resource offers crucial support for those experiencing various forms of abuse, including emotional and financial mistreatment. The hotline can be accessed through their website at thehotline.org or by calling 800-799-7233.

Van Buren highlighted that while the woman may not be facing physical violence, the psychological atmosphere created by her husband’s alcoholism remains detrimental to both her and her children. She stressed that it is not the woman’s responsibility to save her husband from his addiction. Only he can make that choice for himself when he is ready to confront his issues.

The Importance of Recognizing Abuse

The situation described by this mother is a stark reminder of the complexities surrounding domestic abuse. Many individuals may not recognize the signs of emotional or economic abuse, which can be just as damaging as physical violence. Support networks and hotlines play a vital role in helping victims navigate their options and find a path toward safety.

The mother’s plea encapsulates a broader issue faced by many who find themselves in similar circumstances. Lack of financial independence, transportation, and job opportunities can create significant barriers to leaving abusive relationships. It is crucial for those in similar situations to seek help and explore available resources to ensure their safety and well-being.

In conclusion, reaching out for help is a critical step toward breaking free from an abusive environment. The importance of recognizing the signs of abuse and accessing support cannot be overstated, as no one should have to endure such hardship alone.

For further assistance or to share your own experiences, visit www.DearAbby.com or write to P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.