A massage therapist has made the decision to stop accepting new male clients due to the pervasive sexualization of the profession and the emotional toll of inappropriate behavior. After nearly 30 years in the field, she has found the challenges of working with male clients increasingly overwhelming.
Throughout her career, she has witnessed the profound benefits of therapeutic touch on both physical and emotional well-being. Massage therapy serves as a vital form of social affective touch, fostering healing and connection in a world that often feels disconnected. She has observed clients transform, finding peace and relief through skilled massage. Despite the positive experiences with long-term male clients, the negative encounters have increasingly overshadowed the profession’s rewards.
The therapist’s decision stems from a troubling trend where many men conflate massage therapy with sexual services. This misconception is partly fueled by businesses that misuse the term “massage” to bypass legal constraints. She reports enduring numerous inappropriate jokes and innuendos over the years, which highlight a broader societal problem of sexual repression and aggression.
Her most distressing experience occurred during an abdominal massage when a male client ejaculated without consent. Despite no physical contact, the incident left her feeling manipulated and violated. This incident is not unique; many female massage therapists report similar experiences in online support groups, highlighting a pervasive culture of misconduct that has pushed some to leave the profession altogether.
In a traditional spa setting, she often felt vulnerable. Even in her private practice, she attempted to mitigate risks by screening clients through online searches and setting stringent boundaries. However, the potential for boundary violations remained a constant source of anxiety. Despite requiring all new clients to fill out detailed intake forms warning against sexual requests or innuendos, she found this insufficient to ensure her safety.
The implications of her decision to exclude new male clients are significant. While it may limit her practice and income, the emotional toll of navigating these challenging situations proved too high. She emphasizes that this choice is not a reflection of her feelings toward all men but rather a necessary step to protect herself and maintain a safe and respectful environment for her work.
By prioritizing her well-being, she seeks to reaffirm the true purpose of massage therapy: to provide therapeutic care. This decision serves as a call to male clients to understand and respect the boundaries set by massage therapists, reinforcing what massage therapy is and is not. It also acts as a wake-up call to society regarding the realities many professionals in the touching field, particularly women, face daily.
